Wes Kao · 6 min read · Product Teams
Speak in the affirmative: "Do this" versus "Don't do that"
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Clear communication hinges on speaking in the affirmative rather than the negative. The article argues that saying 'Do this' reduces cognitive load and defensiveness, improving how feedback is received and acted upon, with practical tips for giving feedback, filling the void with actionable guidance, and using visualization to shape outcomes.
Key Takeaways
- Speak in affirmative, actionable language ('Do this') to reduce cognitive load and friction in feedback.
- Replace 'don't' with specific 'do' instructions to improve clarity and tone and avoid sounding reprimanding.
- Fill the void with concrete guidance so recipients know what to do next and avoid misinterpretation.
- Use visualization and framing to help others picture the desired behavior and direction.
Excerpt
👋 Hey, it’s Wes. Welcome to my newsletter on managing up, leading teams, and standing out as a high performer. To level up faster, check out my 2-day course on Executive Communication & Influence . You’ll learn alongside mid-career operators from orgs like Netflix, Stripe, Figma, Anthropic, etc. → Save your spot in the July cohort I originally published a version of this essay in September 2015, and have since expanded it. Enjoy. Read time : 4 minutes Did a friend forward this to you? Subscribe to get my posts directly in your inbox: It’s to your benefit to be…